If you build it, they will come. Flying on faith.

Posted: April 2, 2017 in Uncategorized

the-winds

There are some big changes in my life right now.  I am anxious to see what happens. Anxious and excited.

Here is what is happening in my world.  About a month ago we realized we were going to need to move.  The landlord has not done any of the important things that needed to be done to the house they rent (they took me in until I can get on my feet).  There was hail damage April 2016 and as of today, the tarp they put on it is still coming off in small pieces.  It was never actually repaired.  The foundation has a crack through half of it and there are monthly notices on the door from the bank saying the landlord isn’t making his monthly payments.  Therefore, it will be foreclosed on at some point.  Our lease is up and so we are moving this weekend.

A month or so ago, I posted a Facebook status about how I wasn’t getting enough hours at my part time cashier job and was really worried about finances.  I got many pieces of valuable advice and a few job offers.  One in particular appealed to me.  One of my dearest friends has been doing it for three years.  And I would be working from home. As a writer, that is ideal.  I refuse to get my drivers license again, it lapsed back in 2014.  I had moved back to Texas and thought I had 30 after my birthday to get it renewed.  I went in a week after my birthday.  They said that only applies to people with a Texas drivers license.  I had one from Delaware, so I would have to take the written and driving tests all over again.  I decided that I would just walk to work, it was close enough. My kids began to drive me since the main road I had to cross was like a game of Frogger. Sometimes I would take Uber or Lyft, but that costs one hour of my pay to cover the ride. But, working from home means my kids save time and gas and I don’t have to Uber or Lyft unless I am meeting up with friends(something I haven’t been able to afford to do, but will with the new job).  It just seemed so perfect.

So I bought the special equipment I would need, off Amazon.  I gave my two weeks notice at work.  Paid to have a landline installed in the new house, in my room.  Now I just have to apply for the job.

It occurred to me the other day, that this was much like my favorite go-to movie for when I want to run away from life.  Under the Tuscan Sun.  There is a part of the movie where she is concerned that she made a mistake.  She impulsively bought a huge house that needed serious work.  She only had a certain amount of money left to her name and was putting it into this house.  She was talking to a guy and said she thought she made a mistake.  He asked her why she bought it then.  She said, she wanted a wedding in that house, a family in that house and to cook for lots of people in that house, but it was just her.  He said, “Signora, between Austria and Italy, there is a section of the Alps called the Semmering. It is an impossibly steep, very high part of the mountains. They built a train track over these Alps to connect Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks even before there was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built it because they knew some day, the train would come.”  I loved his explanation of having faith for the things she was preparing for, in her future.

I see this as along those same lines.  I quit my job, bought the equipment, got the landline installed in my room, even arranged my room so I will have an office area with my desk, chair, new equipment and all.  I am planning for a job I haven’t even applied for yet. That is on the to do list for Tuesday.  I am at a point where I can see this as falling off a cliff and fearing the crash or I can see this an opportunity to fly.

I am a bit anxious that there could be a crash, but incredibly excited about my wings.  I knew I would never fly if I didn’t take that leap.  So I jumped.  Now watch me fly.  Faith is the wind beneath my wings.

Thank you for reading.  X

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